3/4 of an inch???

Let's reenact the scene:
Late Sunday night I decide to use my Swiffer Vac to run through the kitchen floor.
Open my utility closet and take it out.
Start to push it along the floor.
Why is my floor wet?
Look at the bottom of the Swiffer and it is wet.
That is weird.
Open up the closet and look down.
The floor is wet.
Oh no...the floor is really wet and it is wet under my beautiful laminate floor.
Bad news.
Water and flooring don't mix.
There isn't THAT much water....
Maybe I spilled something?
I put down some towels and go to bed.

Monday morning:
The floor is still wet.
New towels.

Monday afternoon:
Adam comes over and lays on the floor with the flashlight.
"Look, hun, it is dripping from the bottom."
Crap.
Adam says he has never changed a water heater.
Grab the phone.
"Dad? My hot water heater is broken! Can you replace it?"
"Well, I did the one at the old house, I will come over after work."
Dad comes over and looks.
Dad measures and I write.
Go to the store and look at the hot water heaters that are the same brand and size.
Hmm....this is 16 1/4 inches in diameter and we wrote down 15 1/2.
Dad considers that he possibly measured wrong.
Buy the hot water heater and supplies for $403.
(At least that is 403 miles!)
Drive home.
Adam comes over.
Go inside and measure the old one again.
Crap.
It really is 15 1/2 inches in diameter and there is NO wiggle room.

Why would they build a utility closet without one little bit of wiggle room?
Did they not consider that at some point down the road it would need to be replaced?

A lousy 3/4 of an inch is keeping me from getting a new hot water heater.
That little drip is potentially causing damage to my beautiful floor.
I am running out of dry rags.
Now I have to try to call and see if one can be specially ordered.
That sounds like more money to me.

My water situation

Dad and Adam looking at the old one

I am NOT happy with the dimensions of the new one that is now sitting in my garage!

Thanks Dad for trying, helping me buy it and giving up your evening to come over here! Thanks Adam for being a trouper, diagnosing the problem and always be willing to help and learn!

**Note:

Apparently neither Adam or Dad were keen on my idea of just shoving some Mighty Putty into the leak. Adam did say it would be a nice tribute to Billy Mays though!